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it cant be

Recently there was a young man in the police blotter that I knew the family. When I sent a message asking a friend if it was indeed him. The answer was yes but it cant be. I ponder the question of why we would say it cant be. It led to 3 possible reasons: -Hes a Christian- is it acurate to think that Christians are not going to get themselves into problems like this. -He comes from a good home- translation hes from a middle class family full of Christian values and that would keep him from doing any crimes. -He is a good kid- translation the black and white dicatomy of good people and bad people. In the end do any of these answer adaquately the question of why? If there isnt a clearly defined answer or a clear cut kind or group of people who fit into the category of those who do wrong, then is the answer none of us are immune to ruining our lives? If we all are capable of both good and bad how does that help us respond to others and give grace to ourselves?
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Wisdom equals more sorrow

Ecclesiastes 1:18 For in much wisdom is much vexation, and he who increases wisdom increases sorrow. The start of 2019 finds me in a broken confused and fragile mental state. With many conflicting desires, ideas, and ways to go in life I am not sure where this year will take me. Unraveling the past thoughts emotions and experiences has made this verse come to light personally. Is the reason Ive become more unsure is because of wisdom? Being naive about many things in life can be blissful, simple and easier. When I think there are the black and white causes of every problem or these are the good people in life and these are the bad or these are the exact reason why pain and suffering happens. The problem is none of those things are that simple. In purposefully choosing to live love and befriend the non-middle class of society it has brought much more sorrow than clarity. I believe it is because I have been wrong more often than I am right. Many of the judgements thoughts and pre ...
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